To Be Honest I Was Just Going To

Kalali
Jun 09, 2025 · 3 min read

Table of Contents
To Be Honest, I Was Just Going To…: Mastering the Art of the Understatement
We've all been there. You're mid-conversation, maybe even mid-email, and you want to soften a potentially blunt or controversial statement. That's where the phrase "To be honest, I was just going to…" comes in. It's a surprisingly versatile tool, capable of conveying humility, diffidence, or even a playful sense of mischief. This article will explore the nuances of this seemingly simple phrase and how you can use it effectively in various contexts.
This seemingly casual phrase can significantly impact how your message is received. It acts as a preface, setting the stage for what follows. It signals a degree of vulnerability, suggesting a less formal and more personal approach. This makes it perfect for situations requiring diplomacy and tact. Learn how to use this powerful phrase to improve your communication!
Understanding the Power of Understatement
The beauty of "To be honest, I was just going to…" lies in its inherent understatement. It implies that what you're about to say might be unexpected, perhaps even slightly inappropriate or controversial, given the context. By prefacing your statement with this phrase, you're essentially giving the listener a heads-up, allowing them to mentally prepare for what's coming. This prepares the recipient for potential disagreement, leading to a more receptive audience.
This approach differs sharply from a more direct approach. Instead of stating your opinion plainly, you are softening the blow, making your communication more palatable.
Different Contexts, Different Impacts
The impact of this phrase changes significantly depending on the context:
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In casual conversation: It can create a sense of shared intimacy and honesty. For example, "To be honest, I was just going to skip this party, but I’m glad I came!" conveys a relatable feeling of initial reluctance followed by a positive experience.
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In professional communication (email or meetings): It adds a layer of politeness and softens potentially critical feedback. For example, "To be honest, I was just going to send this report as is, but I noticed a few errors" is more diplomatic than directly pointing out mistakes.
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In creative writing: It can establish a relatable character voice, adding depth and complexity. A character might use this phrase to reveal a hidden motive or a personal struggle, creating a more human and believable persona.
Examples of Effective Usage
Let's look at some examples illustrating the versatility of the phrase:
- Making a polite refusal: "To be honest, I was just going to say no, but I appreciate the offer."
- Offering constructive criticism: "To be honest, I was just going to mention it briefly, but your presentation could benefit from more visual aids."
- Sharing a personal confession: "To be honest, I was just going to keep this to myself, but I'm really struggling with this project."
- Expressing a surprising opinion: "To be honest, I was just going to keep quiet, but I strongly disagree with that decision."
- Downplaying a personal accomplishment: "To be honest, I was just going to let it slide, but I'm actually really proud of finishing this marathon."
Potential Pitfalls to Avoid
While this phrase can be incredibly effective, it's crucial to avoid overusing it. Overuse can make you sound insincere or even manipulative. Use it sparingly, only when genuinely appropriate to the situation.
Additionally, ensure that what follows the phrase justifies its use. If your statement is innocuous and requires no softening, the phrase feels unnecessary and somewhat disingenuous.
Conclusion: The Art of Subtlety
"To be honest, I was just going to…" is more than just a filler phrase; it's a strategic tool for effective communication. By mastering its usage, you can navigate sensitive conversations, deliver constructive criticism, and express your thoughts with both honesty and grace. Remember to use it judiciously, ensuring it adds value and enhances the overall impact of your message. Use it wisely, and watch how it improves your interpersonal interactions.
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